Think Pretty Smart

Vulgarity

About yesterday...Did y'all know if you change carriers, your blocked numbers are no longer blocked?  Welp...Now you know.  Behave accordingly.  And if you have a good call blocking software for iPhones, let me know cus my carrier wasn't all that helpful!

Anyway though...

My Old Spot

I finally got a chance to meet the person who moved into my old spot.  This is after he sent some packages and mail back.  LOL  He and I were chatting and he mentioned that a 'big Black man' had come to the house looking for me.  My heart sank.  see, not that many people knew where I lived.  I could count the number of 'big Black men' who knew where I lived on my hands.  I went through my mental Rolodex and kept coming back to one person.  He's big and Black and he doesn't know I moved. 

My Other Brother

My father is getting up in age.  I expect to outlive him.  He's already told me he has no kids younger than the brother and sister from his second marriage.  Whatever he has will be split between us.  But there's this other brother.  An outside child my grandmother and mother have mentioned. 

In the last year or so, my dad and I talked about it. I've known for years and I can't say I was upset with my father.  I was/am mostly disappointed that he knows this child (now grown man), is out there and he's not lifted nary a finger to contact him or biologically confirm that he is the father.  My mom knew the woman's name and circumstances because my grandma was nice enough to share.  As an adult, I've looked the woman up but never called.

Entitlement

I ended up with glasses in my possession.  I offered to mail them to the owner who was going home to in another state.  He didn't ask, I offered.  And I don't do airport runs, for most people.  I never mind picking him up frmo the airport.  Why? 

There I was in the post office, a place not fit for my delicate spirit, packing his glasses to get them to him before his next visit to my state.  Why though?  I wouldn't do this for most people.  It would be a far bridge to say we're dating, we ever dated, or are dating.  I don't mind doing things for him because in the two years we've known each other, he has never made me feel obligated to do anything.  Not one single time.  He's never tried to covertly or overtly reminded me that if I wouldn't do something, there would be loads of women who would.  And the truth is, there would be.

Men who constantly remind women what other women are willing to do to gain favor and stay in his good graces?  They turn me off.  Also, I kinda feel sorry for them because they've got to proclaim what they can get.  Their presence and personality aren't enough to inspire women to do nice things for them.  Furthermore, those men probably aren't used to having nice things done for them.  Now that they believe they have something women want, they try to hold that over womens' heads and punish those women for years the men suffered, not due to the women but due to their own wackness. 

On the flip side, I have had a man wake me up with a tap on the shoulder and say he was hungry.  Our relationship started to change in that instant.  I don't mind doing shyt.  I mind someone trying to make me feel obligated.  So when I was on SingleBlackMale.net on recently and read some of the comments, I decided to mainly stick to the thread I'd started.  As much as men don't like entitled women, this woman hates entitled men even more.  With them comes a feeling of obligation which causes women to put themselves in a competition with other women who may or man not exist.  Me no want--ever. 

I don't compete with other women even when men try to put me in that position.  I don't compete with women who try to compete with me.  This frustrates the people who try to get me into the competitive position.

I understand how one would get drawn into a competition when dealing with someone who is overt about being entitled to this, that, and the third.

Celebrate Good Times! Come On!

Today is the day my mother pushed me out--at a good Catholic hospital.  She didn't have a hard labor so she can't hold that over my head.  As for my daddy, I don't think he was in the room.  I feel like men weren't allowed.  At either rate, I don't expect to hear from him until late in the day.  He still doesn't know my birthdate or exactly how old I am.  My mother calls him to remind him yearly.  Still, by February he won't be sure of my exact age.  I'm used to it.

The Knight In Shining Armor--Guest Blogger @Blame_Ted

Remember on other blogs I had where men would comment and never say things like, "If a hoe won't ___, I'll find one who will?"  Even if were true, they were classy enough to tactfully elude without coming off as jerks.  Days of old but good times.  Way back then is when I met Ted.  We've been causing 'incidents' since then.  Cool people, that Ted.  So the other day when he OFFERED to write a post, I trusted that he would 1) write it on time 2) write something good.  Cus ya know, he's fancy and smart.  Alas, I had too much trust.  But here, a day late, is his post about the KISA.

~Ms. Smart

If, as the movie Usual Suspects suggests, the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist, then the greatest game a man ever ran was convincing the girl that he was running no game at all.

Enter the "nice" dude. The dude who would leave his TV in the middle of the Super Bowl to put together your IKEA curio cabinet. The dude who would leave his warm bed and 200 thread count sheets to give your car a jump in the Applebees parking lot at 11pm on a school night. He does all these sorts of things because you have some draws he wants. And then, once he's gotten them, he marvels that you'd have the audacity to ask him to shovel your driveway while the Lakers are playing.