25%

According to a commercial for one of the popular dating site, 25% of all marriages are happening between people who met on line.  I did it once but there wasn't anything blogworthy that came from it.  It was half-hearted and I stayed on joke time about the whole thing.  But I will say the two dudes I went out with and had a couple good dates with are married now.  It wasn't that long ago that they were on the site.  One married a woman who he grew up with.  Their families had been close since they were kids.  The other married a woman he met on the site.  Both of them were very clear that they were on the site to find wives.

I don't make it a habit to date 'strangers' though.  I haven't been in a relationship with someone who I didn't meet through a friend for at least the last 6 years.  This is not to say I don't meet men when I go out (to the Target, Homecoming, the CVS, the Chipotle, etc.).  But I hardly ever go out with them.  And if I do it because I find out they know a few people I know--even if I never mention it to them. 

Anyhow, I was thinking of how I'd meet my husband--assuming I haven't met him thus far.  I mean, it's possible I have because I meet people over and over and just forget.  Anyway, I've decided I'm gonna go ahead and meet him or re-meet him.  But before I do, I'd like to here from you guys.  Where have you met your spouse or current SO?  Do you think where you meet a person has anything to do with how the relationship progresses or doesn't progress?  Also, I'm interested to see if at least 25% of the respondents met your spouses or current SO online. 

Comments

[dhjax]

Presumably 'online' is a far wider category than merely 'dating sites'. If that's the case, I'd think 25% is conceivable; loads of people are on Facebook, Twitter and all the other social media webbies out there... The girlfriend is someone I knew briefly six to seven years ago but whom I've only reconnected with via the agency of Facebook..

[sherri]

At a conference

[Ames]

We met on a mountain during a ski trip. How we met mattered for our progession.
It mattered for a variety of reasons and I don't want to comment blog.

We did not have mutual friends but California is small so lots of my family
grew up with a few of his friends. At our wedding we discovered
his paternal cousins knew my paternal cousins.

[onefromphilly]

BING BING BING...I'm a 25%er

I met my S/O on Black People Meet. You know that I'm paranoid, so this was no small step for me to try online dating. But because I know of several people who have wonderful relationships and marriages who met on line, I figured I'd give it a chance. My S/O, I'm going to give him the blog name Onelove, was very clear that he was looking for a long term relationship! I honestly think I was just looking for someone nice to date. I think he was more sure of what he wanted becasue he's been divorced longer than me. Anyway....we decided to be exclusive after 1 1/2 months of dating. 1 1/2 years later we live together. We are not officially engaged but we have plans to marry.

And just for the record and consistency, this is a do as I say not as I do moment. Living with someone who you are not OFFICIALLY engaged to is not encouraged by me! I'm older, so I can do it.

[Ted]

Through a college classmate while on a long weekend vacay.

However, I have dated one girl I met online and was quite serious about her. We started talking online back in the old AOL dial-up days. We eventually met in person after about 2 months of chatting/phone calls, and started dating thereafter. We were together, on and off, for about 18 months. I was *this* close to proposing, but alas, 'twas not to be.

All that to say, aside from the stigma of the "how you met" question, it really isn't a big deal. The research that one should do when meeting someone online is the same as one should do when meeting someone in person. Crazy can be digital or physical 'cause you know crazy doesn't care about mediums. lol

[Honest]

"Do you think where you meet a person has anything to do with how the relationship progresses or doesn't progress?"

I think a couple's mindset and compatibility has more to do with how a relationship progresses or doesn't progresses regardless of where they met.

[Anna N.]

I met my fiance on the internet, but it wasn't a dating site. I was looking for a stable roomie, he was looking for a place to live that was close to his military base. A few background/credit checks later and he moved in. After just being roomies for awhile we became friends, then I gave him 2 drinks and he kissed me.

How we met had a lot to do with why we worked, even though I'd never recommend it, lol. We had already seen the "real deal" of each other because we weren't thinking a dang thing about a relationship - no representatives. Both of us are more homebody than out and about, and I don't think we would have crossed paths any other way.

[Beautifully Complex]

I agree with Honest on this one. I met my ex-husband through a Soror who was a mutual friend to both of us. The marriage only lasted 10 years & we dated for several years prior. I am no stranger to online dating. I did it alot for 3 years after my divorce. I met my share of wierdo's but mostly just encountered men that I was simply not compatible with, emotionally, spiritually, or intellectually after getting past their representative. Currently I am in a serious relationship with a guy that I met quite randomly in a Cigar Bar with friends. It will be a year in January & marriage is something that we discuss often & he has made his intentions clear. I think mindset & compatibility between two people trumps most other things.

[Ames]

I am thinking bloggers or blog readers might be more likely to have dated
a person met online.

I met dh before I started blogging and before I started using the Internet
socially. Since becoming a social user I met my wedding planner, book
club people, some acquaintances and many clients.

[Miss Ali D]

25 percent-er here! I met my fiancé on Match.

I think it doesn't matter where you meet, it's all about each others mindset and timing.

[SoJo]

What Honest said. Quite a few of my LSs and sorors met their now husbands through "Match" and are doing well.

For all of the happy couples that I know, the stories of how they met were all different. The similarity lies in the intentions they had/developed while they were dating.

[Petite Pearl]

I met my husband in grad school.

[Tiffany In Houston]

I am also a 25%! I met my husband initially via Facebook. We had joined a FB group hosted by a mutual friend and I friended him based on our interactions in the group. I think you know how my story ended up. :)

[Cyn]

I met the man that I am dating on Black People Meet.

[L.P.]

I met the SO at the wedding of our mutual cousin.. It's really a small world we grew up in so most likely, we would have known people in common...

I dated a guy I met online and it was pretty cool. It ended up being a friend of friends of friends...

I think meeting someone online is no longer taboo especially when you meet them on sites that are very interests-based.

[TravelDiva]

I met The FireMarshall on the 9mm range at West Point. I guess you could boil it down to "we met at college". I also agree with Honest...I believe it has to do with the compatability, goals & mindset of the couple in question, not the location.

[Akima]

We met at a happy hour but I also like a little "background" on men before I'll date them so I sort of blew him off. But one of my friends knew him, vouched for him and asked if she could share my contact info.

I agree with the others that where you meet has less to do with how a relationship progress than compatibility. But I think that's a good reason to meet potentials through friends. There are some kinds of foolishness that are weeded out just because your friend circle won't put up with it.

[Missy]

When and where you meet your SO definitely ha an affect on the course of the relationship. I haven't really done online dating but I know the friends I've met online get to know me a lot quicker than the friends I make in person. It's so easy to share about yourself behind a screen because you don't have to deal with the awkwardness. In a way this is good in that you get some key issues out of the way from the beginning but it can also be bad because you might know too much about each other too soon taking away a lot of the fun of getting to know someone and creating a false sense of trust that may or may not be warranted.

[KaNisa]

25%er. Met dude on a Greek website.

I thought it was well designed and asked who made it.

They pointed me to my dude, and I found out he lived 2 blocks from my office.

Lots of online talking...I like that he met the real me before he met my representative. He read my blog and through some of my archives maybe to research a bit, but my blog persona is the real me once you get past the shy layers.

[aroundthewaygirl]

matchdotcom bride here.

[Ms. Smart]

Oooh Boooo! Who you?! Welcome and shIrt.

[CreoleInDC]

Love@AOL which is currently Match.com!

[Ms. Smart]

Hey babes!

[CreoleInDC]

Gosh I'm hurting for you guys. Popped on Twitter and realized what happened. I said prayers for all to be able to find some kind of peace.