Winter Is Coming

Dear Readers,

The following, unedited post is brought to you by the letters 'T', 'E', and 'D'.  Please react accordginly.

Management

Despite the repeated warnings that winter is coming, the 2011 summer commenced with the series finale of the year’s hottest new show: HBO’s Game of Thrones.

If you have been living under a rock for the past few months, you would already know about this because Drogo would have beaten the hell out of you and your weak little rock. But in case your rock was beyond The Wall, let me break it down for you with some quicknesses right quick:

Google “Game of Thrones.”

Was that quick enough? Questions? Ok, let’s move on…  winter is coming and Ms. Smart has a ninja on a 600 word limit and a close of business deadline.

Black women’s viewership of this series is like none I’ve seen before for this genre. Why is this so? Because every man they’ve ever dated and every relationship they’ve ever had are captured in Game of Thrones characters. What is strikingly obvious to those of us with too much wine and free time is that Game of Thrones is the perfect dysphemism for black relationships.

Google that. Quickly. Winter is coming.

More than any other race of women, Black women want a man who can provide security above all else; physical, emotional, and financial security. As a result, Black men peacock our ability to provide security in order to attract women. The Game of Thrones character Ned Stark is who men advertise to be (but usually aren’t), and who women pine for. And while seeking out her Ned, a black woman will date the security spectrum of men that are more like other Game of Thrones characters not named Stark. Two quick examples:

Khal Drogo: The thug dude who can provide hella security, but his azz is just as liable to end up in jail for exercising his brand of security, which is also known as “damn crazy.” And while he may saturate your panty liner with his physique, his obsession with your child-bearing hips and ultimate fighting championships isn’t sufficient foreplay for you.

Viserys Targaryen / King Joffrey: The dude who can’t really provide you with an iota of security, but you date him anyway because you’re Miss Independent Superwoman an’ shyt. And you’ll  just “fix the bytch” in him. This, of course, doesn’t work out because you soon realize that you can kick his ass. And no woman wants a man who she thinks she can beat up. And that’s the truest shyt I ever wrote.

And for those of ya’ll WITH a man, Game of Thrones highlights YOUR relationship. Two quick examples:

Sir Jamie and Queen Cersai Lannister – They are brother and sister… just like you and your man.

Oh yes I did.

You do realize that men and women often fall in love with and/or marry people that remind them of family members they either idolize or have a subconscious yearning to fix, right? Freud isn’t just how the British pronounce this word --> fried.

Joffrey and Sansa: This is the “ I don’t really like you but we ain’t gettin no younger so we might as well do it” relationship. If you haven’t been in a “minus well” relationship, you are either a virgin or YOU were the person your significant other settled for.

But generally, this show, through the black relationship lens, is about the struggle to find, earn, and keep the Kingdom, or in this context, love. In the course of failed relationships and friendship betrayals and bad choices, we become stronger and more ready to assume the throne when the time comes.

And we must do this quickly, because winter is coming. That phrase is the series’ ominous one that looms over everything that happens in the Kingdom. All that is ever said about it is that winter is bad… and long… and full of death.

Black women have been conditioned to think that “winter” is 40… as in years old. You better hurry and find your Ned on an Iron Throne before winter comes!

This, of course, is inaccurate. But the state of the black love conversation today means that if a woman is 40, unmarried, and without kids, winter messed around and came… and snowed on her, her cats, her table set for 1, and her HSN crochet kit.

But do not fear ladies, for there are men on duty at The Wall to meet Winter and stave it off. After all, in the end and through the fire, your precious eggs do bear life.

Comments

[KaNisa]

*stares pepo down as my baby dragons nurse (like in the book)

[Blame_Ted]

Word? I don't think TV would have been ready for that visual

[Blame_Ted]

For the record, there is a black man corollary as well. We long for Daenarys Targaryens, make our mistakes pursuing Queen Cersei, and fill our lonely nights with the Ros types.

And for some reason, in this current generation of single black dudes, marriage is seen as winter.

[Ms. Smart]

But they showed a 12 year old boy nursing!?

[Ms. Smart]

Don't get me started about winter, marriage, and Black men. I also find men of a certain age, who deal with women of a certain age, treat marriage like the iron thrown. Fools are out here trying to use it as a carrot. I'm like, "Dude! Marrying YOU in your current state is supposed to be the iron thrown? You're kidding right?"

[Blame_Ted]

Now you know breast-feeding a child is not considered obscene, especially by the liberal crowd.

But bestiality?!? Never acceptable.

[TheTravelDiva]

Thank you Ted! Slayed in the Spirit. While I have not been watching I'm reading the books on my nook. Nailed it although I don't feel I fall into either of the married examples...well maybe I subconsciously picked TheFireMarshall who, now that I think about it, reminds me of my grandfather. I lived with my grandparents for a couple of years when real young & he died when I was 7. TheFireMarshall definitly has his temperment.

[Akima 78]

Winter is coming is the most ominous phrase I've heard in a while, especially once you realize their winters can last a decade. I don't know if Old Nan scared Bran but she certainly scared me with her story about White Walkers and giant spiders.

Anywho, while I agree that this is the best show (and fantasy series) to come out in a while, I think women are following it for another reason. It's like Dynasty set in medieval Britain with a dash of Middle Earth. With most other fantasy shows and books, the relationships take a second fiddle to the story. With Game of Thrones, the relationships and motivations ARE the plot. Figuring out what someone's agenda is and who to trust is the whole point. Most women have been doing that since middle school.

[Blame_Ted]

Men that dangle marriage as a means of attracting women are not at all serious about getting married. What you have experience is game gone wrong.

Even for that dude, nay, ESPECIALLY for that dude, marriage is the winter his azz is desperately trying to avoid. But he will use it to conjure up a woman's fear of HER winter as a means to get some bosom.

[Akima 78]

The books are serious. I would put one down and immediately pick up the next one. I hope that the author finishes this series soon, I need to know!!

[Blame_Ted]

I know for certain that I'm with a woman who reminds me of two specific relatives: one of which I wanted to "fix," and the other who has a particular personal strength that I always wished I had.

I'm telling ya'll... we marry "relatives."

[Blame_Ted]

Very true. There is absolutely a soap opera bend to the series. But daytime soaps are like a Zane book to the Game Of Thrones Toni Morrison.

That's why I think women take to this fantasy series more than normal. Whereas what they encounter daily is drama, Game of Thrones is about the art of life, love, and living. And as you know, drama and art are two very different things.

[KaNisa]

What about Tyrion? What dude is he? John Snow too...

The meme is that John is emo...

[Ms. Smart]

My men are usually a mix between my step-dad and father. I think the attraction to men who are like my daddy is genetic cus I didn't spend much time observing him as a child. Our relationship is mostly built from my college years and beyond. But with my step-dad, his dad and his brothers, they were all a certain 'way'. I don't go looking for that 'way' but it finds me. LOL
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

[Blame_Ted]

Tyrion, in my view, is the dude who is actually good at heart, but acts like an azzhole as a defense mechanism that develops over the years. In other words, he is the odd dude (too ugly, too short, too skinny, too nerdy, etc) that women crap on in high school and college, but then want to marry when they are ready to settle down. Of course, this dude treats those women like garbage when they come back around at 30 y/o wanting a baby and husband. He can provide security, but you have to break through his shell.

John Snow? I see him as Theo-ish. Actually, more like Michael Evans. He has to take the hard road to respectability and rely on his intellect and ethics to make it in life. This dude grows up to be Ned Starkish. But he will attract the type of woman who likes a man who had to earn his ability to provide security more than the type of man who was born into security and just had to maintain it. So some women like Robb Starks (Theos - good family, middle class, born secure, home training from day 1) and some like John Snows (Michaels - born into nothing but love, made it from hard work and intellect alone, earned ability to provide security). There are two kinds of Ned Starks: those who are born (Robb-Theo), and those who are made (John-Michael).

By the way, because I am making this stuff up as I go, there's no way I can be wrong. lol

[Ms. Smart]

It's the new Falcon Crest that you can watch w/your boo!
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

[Blame_Ted]

Me thinks you have a topic for tomorrow!

I recently saw FB pictures of the new boyfriend of my ex from high school. Tell me why this dude looks like her first boyfriend (who I looked like), me, her long-term boyfriend after me, and both her babby-daddies?!? LOL She latches onto a very particular look and type of dude. And it is too similar to be just by chance. Her type is absolutely linked to something or someone from her past, and she can't shake that shyt for nothing.

[Ms. Smart]

Yeah well, I was born in winter! I ain't scared!

[Ms. Smart]

In other words, he's 88% of the Black educated men who don't come from educated stock?

[Blame_Ted]

Who? the Tyrion types? Naw, 88% is way too high. I think those types are more in the 7 to 9% realm. Not many dudes genuinely hated on in high school have the professional and financial pedigree to talk shyt to out-of-his-league hottie from home.

If you're talking about the John Snow types, though? Perhaps. But it isn't just about education. Because we all know dudes and gals with graduate degrees that could be mistaken for a 106&Park wannabe VJ at 2pm on a Tuesday.

[Ms. Smart]

Remember I live in the DC metro area. One day, I'm gonna have to tell you some stories. If you had a beer for every piece of craziness I have heard in just the last SIX years, you'd die of alcohol poisoning. Now, I just ask about high school up front. Oooh, another story I need to tell is about the one person I have ever hated. That is Thursday's post.
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

[SoJo]

I'm trying to keep up with all of the comments but because I just watched ALL of these episodes yesterday (no thanks to those of you who were trying to distract me), I'm getting confused with the characters!

#yesthisisanexcusetogowatchthemallagain

[Ms. Smart]

When I would occasionally have too much 'times on my hands' as a child, I'd often be with my pre-approved friends. We'd be going stir crazy. You are going stir crazy! Right about now is when my mom's best friend would tell me, her daughter, and her niece to go find something to do.

[SoJo]

You know that the only thing that works with me is suggesting that I go take a nap. *_* #F5