Slangin'

I watched Crime Inc, the other night and dammit if every time I watch that show, I have a 'fug school' moment.  I feel like there are so many illegal things I would do, and be successful at doing, if not for my paralyzing fear of jail, Diabla, and jail issued panties. 

The episode was about prescription drugs.  I have several friends who write prescriptions (call them in) and who are pharm reps.  So feel like I have the opportunity to sell legal drugs illegally.  I had no idea people were selling more that erectile dysfunction drugs.  I can see why people would want the good drugs though.    Had I thought about it, the best pills to see wouldn't be the erectile dysfunction drugs.  Or so I thought.

As a woman, I'll pretty much go to the doctor for anything.  Therefore, if I were having a chexual problem, I'd make an appointment and see what the deal was.  The idea that a man would try to get erectile dysfunction drugs without consulting a doctor is crazy to me.  At least go get the prescription first, then try to get them cheaper maybe.  But I'm paranoid about getting drugs that may or may not be the proper chemical mix. 

If my guy was having trouble, assuming he doesn't try to blame me, I would want to know if he is taking something.  Hell, what if he has a heart attack and I have to call the ambulance?!  I'd want to be able to tell them exactly what he took.

I have only known one guy who was open about his use of 'drugs'.  He was FL's neighbor.  For whatever reason, it came up one day and he said he got them from a relative.  I forget why he said he was taking it.  But I do remember he was like 32 at the time.  His SO didn't know.  Looking back, he probably had high blood pressure or something else that can affect performance.  That is why a man should see a doctor.  He could be taking something that could cover up the root problem.

Then I got to thinking about the men I know who are 35+ and have left women because they weren't able to perform with those women.  I'm starting to think some of them were blaming the women for their own issues.  Those men probably never considered that something may be physically wrong that stops them from getting and maintaining an erection.

I know this is a sensitive topic.  I know every man has probably been made to feel embarrassed after he has shared a secret with a woman and she blabbed it to the world.  But if he's having chex with someone, especially at an age where these 'issues usually begin', he should be comfortable enough with him/her to have an honest discussion. 

Comments

[Blame_Ted]

Did you just big up yourself on the sly by talking about your man having a heart attack?? Yep, you did.

As for dude getting the blackmarket blueys, I am willing to bet that his real issue was a mental one. Men hesitate to go get checked out when they are having difficulty because they are either too embarrassed that their manhood will be seen to be failing or because they don't want to be told a broken brain is the cause of the issue. There is nothing appealing to women about a weak body or a weak mind, so men will stave those things off by any means necessary.

Bottom line though is a man with a physical issue may blame the first or second woman it happens with, but ultimately he will go get looked at because when he can't perform at all, pride goes out the damn window and getting fixed is priority 1. However dude with a MENTAL issue??? This may be unpopular in with your readers, but it probably IS the woman.

[Ms. Smart]

The heart attack comment has more to do with the age of the men I deal with AND that they're Black. We both know a Black man is liable to catch a stroke, heart attack, etc. anytime after 27!

I have never been a man so it's hard for me to wrap my mind around the idea that a dude would have an issue that impacts both of us and not tell me. His not saying anything would make me wonder about a whole lot of stuff. He'd be quick to call me crazy. My attitude would change as would his. Our relationship would be damaged when he could've just said something. In the end, if he did, I'd probably still wonder why it took so long. I think a lot. LOL
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

[Blame_Ted]

Uh huh, black male heart disease my azz. Whateva Sunshine!!

As for dude, he probably WAS telling the woman something was up, but she just thought he was trying to hoe-ify her. He probably told her to wear this, or do that, or whatever. Again, if it's mental, it's HER, not his body. (I say that only partly in jest). If, in response to his plea, she gets defensive, condescending, or just flat out refuses, then it's good as over. And she has 51% of the blame, at least.

Now if his problem was truly physical, then he should be honest with her (assuming he loves her and doesn't want to go anywhere).A check up is in order and THEN maybe he can get his pill on legally.

But back to the heart of your post, I've seen too many episodes of L&O: SVU to ever take a pill someone gave me. If it wasn't prescribed on a doctor's pad in horrible writing, I ain't for it.

[Ms. Smart]

I don't know. I've dated men who were ill. I knew about high cholesterol and some other shyt. But the one who had a lump in his testicle? Took me pressing him about going to the doctors so much before he broke the seal on that information. It wasn't cancer, BTW.

And pleas? What pleas? If dude is trying to get her to do stuff and none of it's working, what else is there but to see the doctor.

You know what this reminds me of? I'll tell you--fertility. In the last 10-15 years women have been able to shed some of the shame, be open about needing help, etc. I think men need to get to that point with ED.
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

[WuDaMan]

Oh so you killin em hunh? LMFBBO
So you, "paranoid about getting drugs that may or may not be the proper chemical mix." Eh try it. In the words of the TT bar owner in Kill Bill II, "Take a hit, be somebody." I don't know why but that cracks me up.
I'm only a little scared of the Dr. Pretty much don't care what he has too say unless he wants to put one of those handy capable signs on my sack. & if dude is cold breaking up w/ a chick cuz it ain't going down the way he wanted to (preferably AFTER the wild monkey chex). Then it's his prerogative to cut ties w/ her right? I mean how you know he ain't trying to live out some midlife crisis as a "in his mind" pron star? Or he ain't trying to run that old hood game?

[Ms. Smart]

Da heck are you talking about? We're talking about drugs, black market drug, erectile dysfunction and your ass Dougie's in talking abt porn?!
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

[WuDaMan]

I'm saying you never know what a dude has in mind for a relationship. I'm just saying like you saying the, "why" is oh so important. I mean I remember when I was a medic fools was mixing blue pills w/ coca in a just for that tantric effect. You never know...

[Ms. Smart]

And I'm saying I'd probably want to know before he got illegal 'help'. I'd encourage him to go to a real doctor because the inability to achieve and maintain an erection (in men over 35) is often a sign of a bigger issue.
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

[WuDaMan]

Bigger issue? How often? Inquiring minds and stuff. & if we talking about an AA man then in some circles 35 + is a full life. #NothinToLoose LMBO & how sweet that you would be paranoid enough for him too. But it's his body right?

[Ms. Smart]

If you ever find yourself with a woman who isn't concerned for your health, run. As for the deeper causes, there's a whole list on the Mayo Clinic website. I'm on my bb so I'll just give u a few:

Heart disease
Clogged blood vessels
High blood pressure
Diabetes
Parkinson's disease
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

[WuDaMan]

Alright. Say that conversation goes down. She like, "I don't know you could get sold some "floories" like from that movie the hang over. & he could be like, "but Baby ain't we gone fly you to *insert third world country* to get you that *insert needless cosmetic procedure or even invasive holistic procedure* for that low low." *end scene*

[KaNisa]

I believe dudes self medicate more than chicks...I don't even know any dudes that go to the doctor for regular checkups, much less when they're actually sick.

AND there's a potential for peen sickness too?

No way man...

I often wonder how dudes cope when the man downstairs doesn't quite work anymore. While it's true soldiers can always be sent out, doesn't mean they'll be given marching orders...

If you know what I mean.

It's gotta be tough to define yourself by that...then it goes away never to return...except maybe if you're lucky with pills.

[Momswholunch.blogspot.com]

Some young men take the blue pill to impress a new woman. They function normally but the pill makes them go, go, go.

Apparently going long trumps potential abuse to the heart.